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01-Mar-2019 03:37

All three live there together, but they aren’t roommates—they’re lovers. Sarah is 46 and has an Earth Motherly demeanor that put me at relative ease.

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Sarah had been accustomed to seeing Michael whenever she wanted, but she started to feel a pang when he spent time with Jonica.“At first I thought, ‘Is something bad happening, something I don’t want to support? “No, I want to support Michael and Jonica in being together. I can be an anxious person, so maybe I was feeling anxious. I might go for a walk or play guitar.“It’s part of learning a healthy self-awareness and the ability to self-soothe,” she added.

Many couples who become interested in polyamory start by looking for a single, bisexual woman to add to the relationship.

In fact, this quest has become so common (and its object has remained so elusive) that it’s known as “hunting the unicorn.”But Sheff cautions that once said unicorn is caught, “the men are sometimes not as well-tended as they hoped to be.

Sarah and Michael met 15 years ago when they were both folk singers and active in the polyamorous community.

Both of them say they knew from a young age that there was something different about their sexuality.

Together, they form a polyamorous “triad”— one of the many formations that’s possible in this jellyfish of a sexual preference.