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18-Mar-2019 14:32

That’s why I set out to study long-married military couples for my thesis.

More than 1,200 active-duty Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine Corps and Coast Guard members and their spouses married more than 15 years took my online survey about long-married military couples.

Dads would come home from deployment and go back to driving kids to school or sports. They did laundry (the chore mentioned most often) or vacuumed or cleaned up the kitchen after dinner.

They didn’t do these chores perfectly or even the way their wives would have done it.

It could also mean that young marriage is such an ingrained part of military life that there are still institutional supports for marriage.

This doesn’t mean young couples should run to the altar just yet.

No matter what brought the servicemember into the military, by the time they had been married 15 years, officers and enlisted in this study were committed to the military for the duration. Among those interviewed, the promise of a retirement income kept them deploying, moving and taking jobs with more responsibility. The majority of service members in the survey indicated that they thought of their work as more than just a job.

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How did those couples get through their years of PCS moves and deployment and war without giving up on each other?I asked how they viewed their own work and how they viewed their spouse’s job.